PRIMEVAL
Company President Steve Cole reports (with help from John Crawford, our European VP):
I love this British TV show (so does John), but didn't anybody tell the Brits that a "season" is 22 episodes, not six or seven? (Imagine if they were now on episode 45 instead of Episode 16?) I always loved dinosaurs (and other ancient beasts) and the CGI effects are great. The stories are good enough, better than most of what we get on the SciFi Channel. I like most of the characters, and respect the two annoying junior members of the team for being what the writers needed in order to create a good mix of quirky scientists managed by a bunch of government bureaucrats and protected a few redshirts ... uh ... soldiers (an old Hollywood cliche). But, being a soldier, and having spent several years as a "first responder, waiting for the next terrorist attack" who was deeply involved in emergency planning at city, county, and regional levels, I must say, there is just so very much wrong here. And it doesn't HAVE to be wrong. Surely, somewhere in all of Britain, there is one retired soldier and one retired policeman who might have taken a quiet afternoon to just point out a few things to the writers and producers, things that don't change the show but make it more "realistic" and less a bunch of Scooby Doo clowns who don't really know how to run this kind of operation. I realize the show may not want to pay a lot of actors to stand around pretending to be soldiers or policemen. Fine, just have the military officer give these imaginary off-camera people orders over the radio. I did think it was good that Season Two saw the creation of a formal organization and headquarters (which doesn't seem to have accomplished all that much) and was very pleased that Season Three opened with "This bunch of nice soldier fellows are here to keep you alive so you can do the scientist thing." But I would want to see better in Season Four. Something like this... (I am sorry if this sounds American instead of British, but I'm doing the best I can. I actually do know a lot about how the British system works, and John made a few edits which corrected what I got wrong.)
==========
Everyone sit down, and listen well. Things are going to change, not for the worse, but -- you will soon agree -- for the better. I am not here, and the new procedures are not designed, to get in your way, and if you ever think that something is wrong, you need to speak up.
=
First, we're adding another group of people to our operation. The six men, Detective Sergeants, -- and one woman, a Detective Inspector, -- you see behind me are plainclothes officers, seconded from the Metropolitan Police Firearms Division -- armed police, and real ones at that. They know more about the streets, and about protecting the public, than you scientists -- or even you soldiers over there. They can blend in, and show you how to. They can work with local authorities, so you don't have to. They can spot suspicious persons, or ordinary citizens who are likely to do something stupid and dangerous, because they've been doing just that all their professional lives. They're all veteran police with a dozen or more years on the street. They all have real, valid, police credentials -- seconded to the Home Office of course -- and nobody will give them a second look or a second thought. When we have to post guards around an anomaly -- or some old building where Professor Cutter thinks the next anomaly will appear, there will be times it will be easier to use plainclothes police for the duty. Most of the time, they will be accompanied by you scientists, and oftentimes you and they will work with soldiers, some of whom may also work in civilian clothes just to avoid raising the public profile. Work with them! They'll keep you alive and cover for you while you do your jobs. We need the perimeter guards assigned to watch an anomaly to have sufficient manpower so if a creature escapes, there are enough people to both block the anomaly and pursue the creature, but not so many, or in such obtrusive dress, as to raise questions or draw a crowd.
=
The soldiers, or sometimes the policemen, will continue to keep you alive, but you need to give them a chance to do that. From this moment forward, when on a mission, the first man through any door is a soldier or a policeman, not a scientist or a civil servant. You lot are too expensive and irreplaceable, and you don't have time to fully train for soldier duties, but we will give you as much training as time allows. In some cases, each of you scientists will be assigned a personal bodyguard. He's your partner, not your keeper and not my spy, there to watch your back while you watch the detectors -- or the creatures. He can carry some of your equipment, but not if it interferes with his job. You protect him and he will protect you. If we suddenly need to deploy a big gun to take down some beast, the soldiers will do that for you, if possible, but every one of you scientists will get full firearms training, and will be licensed to carry a weapon with you. You will learn not just how to shoot, but how to safely carry a weapon and how to get that weapon from point A to point B without scaring the hell out of the citizens standing around. You may have moral objections to firearms, but remember some of the creatures we have seen so far do not have the moral objection to eating you! Finally, remember if your bodyguard is incapacitated, you may have to render his firearm safe so you don't accidentally shoot yourself, or a member of the public. Or worse a member of the public picks it up and dangerously discharges the firearm.
=
Speaking of carrying things with you. Some attention has been paid to creating a standard kit for each of you. Each of you will have three levels of tactical kit available at all times. At level one, which is most of the time, you will continue to wear comfortable civilian clothing so you can blend in -- or formal business attire in your case, Jenny, so you can do your job. However, you ladies will be expected to wear pants and sensible shoes, in case you become involved in a situation that warrants a more active role. One of the new police members of our fraternity is a woman, as you can see, and she will advise you ladies on how to appear stylish in an ensemble that allows you to run at your best speed, climb ladders, and wrestle with creatures. Each of you has a mobile phone; you will each be issued a second mobile phone to carry, switched off, in case you lose the first one. After Mister Conner's misadventure, you will all carry government identification cards with instructions for the local police to call this office if they have any questions. A talented official will field the calls to sooth any ruffled feathers and assure that you can function without hindrance, and without having to bully local police or local government officials.
When needed, which it will be any time you enter a dangerous area, you will move to Level Two. This will include a tactical vest, including numerous items of equipment such as a flashlight, first aid supplies, an encrypted two-way radio (since mobile phones don't work in the jurassic), and other items I will explain later. There will even be a couple of ration bars, so you don't have to leave your post if you get hungry; they might also be useful to coax shy creatures into a cage. Each of you will be issued a police anti-stab vest and will wear them any time you are sent on or called to a situation. At Level Two, you scientists will each carry a dart pistol to safely control any creatures, as well as a real pistol for self-defense. You will have dart rifles -- and real rifles of medium and heavy caliber -- stored in your vehicles. You may use any of the equipment or weapons in your vehicles as you feel necessary, but as I mentioned, it will usually be better send a soldier to get the big rifle while you keep an eye on the detector and creature. You will be given police-style windbreakers that identify you as officials of the Home Office and will wear them when told to do so by Jenny or myself. There will be a detector for each of you, and spare ones stored in your vehicles.
For Level Three, all of you civilians -- as well as you police -- will have full tactical kit of the type worn by the military members of our team should the situation require and give you time to change into it. You will be trained in how to wear and use this equipment so you don't have to puzzle it out for yourselves. We're all on the same side. You will, in turn, train the police and soldiers to use your scientific equipment just in case they have to. We will be using flash-bang grenades in this case; they should distract a creature but we cannot use real grenades in civilian areas. Over time, we are going to experiment with some other personal defense weapons. Expedition equipment will also be stored in your vehicles. If anyone has to pass through an anomaly to explore the other side, we won't have to bash together the gear you need. It will already be on site. As time goes by, and we begin to carry around more and more equipment that we might need, the bulkier items can be moved to support vehicles that the military members of the organization will bring to the site.
Available in your vehicles will be two kinds of gas masks. One will filter out harmful substances, and the other -- sadly, bulkier -- one will have its own self-contained breathing air system. One thing you scientists have never done is to compile a database of the atmosphere found in these ancient time periods -- as best you can determine, or can update from actual experience -- so we can anticipate such problems. Mister Conner, when you read out the database entry for the creature, tell us what he's breathing so we can prepare. I expect that database to be established by the end of the day and as complete as possible by the end of the week.
=
We will have a small number of standard cover stories. Jenny will select, for each mission, which one to use, and you are then free to tell the story to anyone who needs to be told a story to get them to cooperate. One will be a safety exercise, another will involve diseased animals which escaped from a medical testing laboratory, another will be a chemical spill. Jenny will consult with you as to which one is the most plausible in a given scenario. In extreme cases, when someone is absolutely impossible to deal with in any other way, Jenny, and only Jenny, is authorized to quietly communicate what we call the ultimate cover story. I've asked her to give you a sample. You'll have to imagine her quietly communicating this in a whisper, leaning close to the troublesome person. Jenny, if you will?
=
"We're from the Home Office Special Operations Department, and we're trying to deal with an impossible situation and we need your help. Can I rely on your absolute discretion? Very well. What I can tell you is this. A powerful ... high-tech concern ... very high-tech ... is involved in some ... research involving animals. I cannot go into details, you understand ... Official Secrets Act and all that ... very hush-hush ... You see, powerful people are involved in this high-tech concern ... people with titles ... very high titles ... the duchy of ... No, I have said too much. But these are people who want this kept quiet until the boys in the lab coats have completed their vital work ... work which will ultimately bring billions of pounds of new business to the UK. You do understand why I cannot say more? Foreign interests don't even know to come snooping around, and we don't want them to. Her Majesty's government requires that this be kept entirely secret, and that you are expected and required to keep that secret. If you cannot keep this secret, we can arrange a comfortable ... place for you to stay ... until this vital work is complete ... shouldn't be more than a decade or so ... There's a good chap."
=
Thank you, Jenny.
Finally, personal & ARC security. It seems to me, anyone who feels like it can wander in off the streets and start contributing, either in a positive way or a destructive way. This must cease. I am appointing a Security Officer who is responsible for securing the ARC and advising you on home security. All potential new members of the team will be fully vetted before being brought inside. If you need to bring anyone here, for debriefing or whatever, they will be held -- comfortably -- in a separate area until we have vetted them. Passwords and electronic door codes will be issued individually. Each area in the ARC will be sealed with electronic locks, either with voice print, retinal, fingerprint or some such recommended by the Security Officer as the best solution. Vehicles and bags will be searched inside, out, underneath to stop intruders. The gates will be reinforced and a standard Z entrance built to stop sightseers gazing in and vehicles, or large creatures, from simply crashing in, or out, of the ARC. Other measures will no doubt be introduced and you will be briefed how and why these are applicable.
I need to mention home security. As recent events have shown, members of staff have proved vulnerable at home. Senior personnel in MI5 and MI6 have beefed up home security, and we will look into this for all our staff, as none of us want to live in the ARC together 24/7. But in the meantime, lock your doors and windows and set home alarms if you have them. Its basic stuff but you'd be surprised just how effective it is. Security is everyone's responsibility; if you see a gap in the security procedures point it out. Now, this is difficult, but necessary. Anyone with a new friend, romantic or otherwise, needs to report this and the person will be quietly vetted by security. If someone from outside did want to find a way in, pretending to be your new friend would be the most obvious way to do it.
=
There will be more new faces to come. We'll be creating a second and third team of scientists, not to discharge you but so we can give you some time off and can keep the missions going in spite of any future eventualities. We have been contacted by the Americans, who have their own anomalies and their own version of our organization, as well as by the French. In time, some of them will come over here to exchange ideas.
=
None of these new procedures are intended to hinder or restrict operations. As we have all seen we must prepare for all sorts of emergencies, including those caused by inter-departmental politics or ex-wives. Our watchwords must be "Safety and Security".
Good Luck.
I love this British TV show (so does John), but didn't anybody tell the Brits that a "season" is 22 episodes, not six or seven? (Imagine if they were now on episode 45 instead of Episode 16?) I always loved dinosaurs (and other ancient beasts) and the CGI effects are great. The stories are good enough, better than most of what we get on the SciFi Channel. I like most of the characters, and respect the two annoying junior members of the team for being what the writers needed in order to create a good mix of quirky scientists managed by a bunch of government bureaucrats and protected a few redshirts ... uh ... soldiers (an old Hollywood cliche). But, being a soldier, and having spent several years as a "first responder, waiting for the next terrorist attack" who was deeply involved in emergency planning at city, county, and regional levels, I must say, there is just so very much wrong here. And it doesn't HAVE to be wrong. Surely, somewhere in all of Britain, there is one retired soldier and one retired policeman who might have taken a quiet afternoon to just point out a few things to the writers and producers, things that don't change the show but make it more "realistic" and less a bunch of Scooby Doo clowns who don't really know how to run this kind of operation. I realize the show may not want to pay a lot of actors to stand around pretending to be soldiers or policemen. Fine, just have the military officer give these imaginary off-camera people orders over the radio. I did think it was good that Season Two saw the creation of a formal organization and headquarters (which doesn't seem to have accomplished all that much) and was very pleased that Season Three opened with "This bunch of nice soldier fellows are here to keep you alive so you can do the scientist thing." But I would want to see better in Season Four. Something like this... (I am sorry if this sounds American instead of British, but I'm doing the best I can. I actually do know a lot about how the British system works, and John made a few edits which corrected what I got wrong.)
==========
Everyone sit down, and listen well. Things are going to change, not for the worse, but -- you will soon agree -- for the better. I am not here, and the new procedures are not designed, to get in your way, and if you ever think that something is wrong, you need to speak up.
=
First, we're adding another group of people to our operation. The six men, Detective Sergeants, -- and one woman, a Detective Inspector, -- you see behind me are plainclothes officers, seconded from the Metropolitan Police Firearms Division -- armed police, and real ones at that. They know more about the streets, and about protecting the public, than you scientists -- or even you soldiers over there. They can blend in, and show you how to. They can work with local authorities, so you don't have to. They can spot suspicious persons, or ordinary citizens who are likely to do something stupid and dangerous, because they've been doing just that all their professional lives. They're all veteran police with a dozen or more years on the street. They all have real, valid, police credentials -- seconded to the Home Office of course -- and nobody will give them a second look or a second thought. When we have to post guards around an anomaly -- or some old building where Professor Cutter thinks the next anomaly will appear, there will be times it will be easier to use plainclothes police for the duty. Most of the time, they will be accompanied by you scientists, and oftentimes you and they will work with soldiers, some of whom may also work in civilian clothes just to avoid raising the public profile. Work with them! They'll keep you alive and cover for you while you do your jobs. We need the perimeter guards assigned to watch an anomaly to have sufficient manpower so if a creature escapes, there are enough people to both block the anomaly and pursue the creature, but not so many, or in such obtrusive dress, as to raise questions or draw a crowd.
=
The soldiers, or sometimes the policemen, will continue to keep you alive, but you need to give them a chance to do that. From this moment forward, when on a mission, the first man through any door is a soldier or a policeman, not a scientist or a civil servant. You lot are too expensive and irreplaceable, and you don't have time to fully train for soldier duties, but we will give you as much training as time allows. In some cases, each of you scientists will be assigned a personal bodyguard. He's your partner, not your keeper and not my spy, there to watch your back while you watch the detectors -- or the creatures. He can carry some of your equipment, but not if it interferes with his job. You protect him and he will protect you. If we suddenly need to deploy a big gun to take down some beast, the soldiers will do that for you, if possible, but every one of you scientists will get full firearms training, and will be licensed to carry a weapon with you. You will learn not just how to shoot, but how to safely carry a weapon and how to get that weapon from point A to point B without scaring the hell out of the citizens standing around. You may have moral objections to firearms, but remember some of the creatures we have seen so far do not have the moral objection to eating you! Finally, remember if your bodyguard is incapacitated, you may have to render his firearm safe so you don't accidentally shoot yourself, or a member of the public. Or worse a member of the public picks it up and dangerously discharges the firearm.
=
Speaking of carrying things with you. Some attention has been paid to creating a standard kit for each of you. Each of you will have three levels of tactical kit available at all times. At level one, which is most of the time, you will continue to wear comfortable civilian clothing so you can blend in -- or formal business attire in your case, Jenny, so you can do your job. However, you ladies will be expected to wear pants and sensible shoes, in case you become involved in a situation that warrants a more active role. One of the new police members of our fraternity is a woman, as you can see, and she will advise you ladies on how to appear stylish in an ensemble that allows you to run at your best speed, climb ladders, and wrestle with creatures. Each of you has a mobile phone; you will each be issued a second mobile phone to carry, switched off, in case you lose the first one. After Mister Conner's misadventure, you will all carry government identification cards with instructions for the local police to call this office if they have any questions. A talented official will field the calls to sooth any ruffled feathers and assure that you can function without hindrance, and without having to bully local police or local government officials.
When needed, which it will be any time you enter a dangerous area, you will move to Level Two. This will include a tactical vest, including numerous items of equipment such as a flashlight, first aid supplies, an encrypted two-way radio (since mobile phones don't work in the jurassic), and other items I will explain later. There will even be a couple of ration bars, so you don't have to leave your post if you get hungry; they might also be useful to coax shy creatures into a cage. Each of you will be issued a police anti-stab vest and will wear them any time you are sent on or called to a situation. At Level Two, you scientists will each carry a dart pistol to safely control any creatures, as well as a real pistol for self-defense. You will have dart rifles -- and real rifles of medium and heavy caliber -- stored in your vehicles. You may use any of the equipment or weapons in your vehicles as you feel necessary, but as I mentioned, it will usually be better send a soldier to get the big rifle while you keep an eye on the detector and creature. You will be given police-style windbreakers that identify you as officials of the Home Office and will wear them when told to do so by Jenny or myself. There will be a detector for each of you, and spare ones stored in your vehicles.
For Level Three, all of you civilians -- as well as you police -- will have full tactical kit of the type worn by the military members of our team should the situation require and give you time to change into it. You will be trained in how to wear and use this equipment so you don't have to puzzle it out for yourselves. We're all on the same side. You will, in turn, train the police and soldiers to use your scientific equipment just in case they have to. We will be using flash-bang grenades in this case; they should distract a creature but we cannot use real grenades in civilian areas. Over time, we are going to experiment with some other personal defense weapons. Expedition equipment will also be stored in your vehicles. If anyone has to pass through an anomaly to explore the other side, we won't have to bash together the gear you need. It will already be on site. As time goes by, and we begin to carry around more and more equipment that we might need, the bulkier items can be moved to support vehicles that the military members of the organization will bring to the site.
Available in your vehicles will be two kinds of gas masks. One will filter out harmful substances, and the other -- sadly, bulkier -- one will have its own self-contained breathing air system. One thing you scientists have never done is to compile a database of the atmosphere found in these ancient time periods -- as best you can determine, or can update from actual experience -- so we can anticipate such problems. Mister Conner, when you read out the database entry for the creature, tell us what he's breathing so we can prepare. I expect that database to be established by the end of the day and as complete as possible by the end of the week.
=
We will have a small number of standard cover stories. Jenny will select, for each mission, which one to use, and you are then free to tell the story to anyone who needs to be told a story to get them to cooperate. One will be a safety exercise, another will involve diseased animals which escaped from a medical testing laboratory, another will be a chemical spill. Jenny will consult with you as to which one is the most plausible in a given scenario. In extreme cases, when someone is absolutely impossible to deal with in any other way, Jenny, and only Jenny, is authorized to quietly communicate what we call the ultimate cover story. I've asked her to give you a sample. You'll have to imagine her quietly communicating this in a whisper, leaning close to the troublesome person. Jenny, if you will?
=
"We're from the Home Office Special Operations Department, and we're trying to deal with an impossible situation and we need your help. Can I rely on your absolute discretion? Very well. What I can tell you is this. A powerful ... high-tech concern ... very high-tech ... is involved in some ... research involving animals. I cannot go into details, you understand ... Official Secrets Act and all that ... very hush-hush ... You see, powerful people are involved in this high-tech concern ... people with titles ... very high titles ... the duchy of ... No, I have said too much. But these are people who want this kept quiet until the boys in the lab coats have completed their vital work ... work which will ultimately bring billions of pounds of new business to the UK. You do understand why I cannot say more? Foreign interests don't even know to come snooping around, and we don't want them to. Her Majesty's government requires that this be kept entirely secret, and that you are expected and required to keep that secret. If you cannot keep this secret, we can arrange a comfortable ... place for you to stay ... until this vital work is complete ... shouldn't be more than a decade or so ... There's a good chap."
=
Thank you, Jenny.
Finally, personal & ARC security. It seems to me, anyone who feels like it can wander in off the streets and start contributing, either in a positive way or a destructive way. This must cease. I am appointing a Security Officer who is responsible for securing the ARC and advising you on home security. All potential new members of the team will be fully vetted before being brought inside. If you need to bring anyone here, for debriefing or whatever, they will be held -- comfortably -- in a separate area until we have vetted them. Passwords and electronic door codes will be issued individually. Each area in the ARC will be sealed with electronic locks, either with voice print, retinal, fingerprint or some such recommended by the Security Officer as the best solution. Vehicles and bags will be searched inside, out, underneath to stop intruders. The gates will be reinforced and a standard Z entrance built to stop sightseers gazing in and vehicles, or large creatures, from simply crashing in, or out, of the ARC. Other measures will no doubt be introduced and you will be briefed how and why these are applicable.
I need to mention home security. As recent events have shown, members of staff have proved vulnerable at home. Senior personnel in MI5 and MI6 have beefed up home security, and we will look into this for all our staff, as none of us want to live in the ARC together 24/7. But in the meantime, lock your doors and windows and set home alarms if you have them. Its basic stuff but you'd be surprised just how effective it is. Security is everyone's responsibility; if you see a gap in the security procedures point it out. Now, this is difficult, but necessary. Anyone with a new friend, romantic or otherwise, needs to report this and the person will be quietly vetted by security. If someone from outside did want to find a way in, pretending to be your new friend would be the most obvious way to do it.
=
There will be more new faces to come. We'll be creating a second and third team of scientists, not to discharge you but so we can give you some time off and can keep the missions going in spite of any future eventualities. We have been contacted by the Americans, who have their own anomalies and their own version of our organization, as well as by the French. In time, some of them will come over here to exchange ideas.
=
None of these new procedures are intended to hinder or restrict operations. As we have all seen we must prepare for all sorts of emergencies, including those caused by inter-departmental politics or ex-wives. Our watchwords must be "Safety and Security".
Good Luck.
posted by Federation Commander at 7:16 PM
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